When you’re sick for a long time, with depression or an eating disorder or addictions or anything of that nature, the idea of “recovery” and “healing” is more than just an obstacle. For a lot of people, its a crippling fear. When you’re sick for a long time, that sickness becomes a part of you and it takes away your ability to see a life without it. When I was deep in my depression a few years ago, the idea of overcoming it was taunting and scary. I literally could not remember what it felt like to be happy or to feel anything for that matter. I thought the depression was just a part of me. I didn’t know how to live my life without being depressed. That’s one of the reasons change is so hard. No matter how dreadful, painful, and exhausting our illnesses are, they still serve us some sort of purpose, otherwise we would be able to “snap out of it.” Sickness can become comfortable which makes change seem impossible. But its not. You didn’t get sick overnight and you won’t get better overnight. Baby steps. Just keep trying and one day, healthy could be your new comfort.
This.
I think about this w/ my dad.
(via dream-it-become-it)
